I think I did more research about who did my first tattoo than I did about what college to attend and what car I should buy. I mean, a cringe-worthy tattoo is the quickest way to label yourself as an idiot. You never see upstanding members of society with the Wu-Tang logo tattooed on them by what looks like a five-year-old. People who get dumb tattoos are exclusively blue-collar workers, teenagers who think they’re being edgy, and pretty much every one in the NFL. If you’re none of those, screen your tattoo artists before you allow them to draw permanent things on your body.
And if you’re the kind of person who gets a bad tattoo covered up with an even worse tattoo, well, I hope you never procreate. Your line needs to end here.
1. That girl everyone used to make fun of before and after puberty.
2. Why does it have a mustache?